Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Stranger than Fiction
Oregon Man Shot by Dog During Hunting Trip
Henry Marcum has nothing but kind words for the dog that shot his 23-year-old son. Matthew Marcum was standing in Tillamook Bay at the start of duck-hunting trip when his dog jumped into the boat, setting off a 12-gauge shotgun. The blast blew a hole in the aluminum boat before hitting Marcum, who is recovering from injuries to his legs and buttocks. Henry says he's not angry with the dog, and neither is his son. He adds that the Labrador, Drake, is a good dog and the shooting is "just one of those things."
Henry Marcum has nothing but kind words for the dog that shot his 23-year-old son. Matthew Marcum was standing in Tillamook Bay at the start of duck-hunting trip when his dog jumped into the boat, setting off a 12-gauge shotgun. The blast blew a hole in the aluminum boat before hitting Marcum, who is recovering from injuries to his legs and buttocks. Henry says he's not angry with the dog, and neither is his son. He adds that the Labrador, Drake, is a good dog and the shooting is "just one of those things."
More Riddles from Matthew
What does a chicken nd a band have in commen?
They both have drum sticks.
What did the autumn leaf say to the other autumn leaf?
I'm falling for you.
What washes up on really small beaches?
Microwaves
What is in the middle of Paris?
The letter "R"
Which city do people who talk a lot live?
Babylon
What did the crop say to the farmer?
Why are you always picking on me.
They both have drum sticks.
What did the autumn leaf say to the other autumn leaf?
I'm falling for you.
What washes up on really small beaches?
Microwaves
What is in the middle of Paris?
The letter "R"
Which city do people who talk a lot live?
Babylon
What did the crop say to the farmer?
Why are you always picking on me.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Top 15 Reasons to Be Thankful on Thanksgiving
During Thanksgiving, we're always asked what we're thankful for. So in honor of turkey day, I found this list of 15 reasons to be thankful. If you have anything ya wanna add to the list, be sure to let me know!
I am thankful …
15. That someone else kills the turkey and removes those nasty gizzard things from their bodies.
14. That peanut butter-and-jelly sandwiches are always a safe stand-by when Uncle Dave's trying to cook the turkey in the microwave.
13. For conversation about a bunch of distant relatives you don't know, but you don't care 'cuz the food's so good.
12. For a family that loves you, even if Aunt Dorothy can't stop pinching your cheeks and exclaiming, "My how you've grown!"
11. That Thanksgiving is the one time you can eat for 8 hours straight, feel like ya gotta be rolled away from the table, but you keep right on eating.
10. For the crazy relatives who make you laugh right after you put mashed potatoes in your mouth just so they can watch you blow them out your nose.
9. For getting two days of school off—even though your teachers gave you so much homework, you'll never get it done by New Year's.
8. That this is the one time you don't have to sit next to your little brother who talks with his mouth full—he'll sit across from you instead.
7. For that one food dish you never quite know what it is.
6. For finally graduating from the "kids' table" to the "adults' table." (I graduated a few years ago.)
5. That there's always a football game to snooze through, despite the fact you're sharing a love seat with five of your relatives.
4. For hearing Grandpa pray.
3. That black olives, a.k.a. finger puppets, can add entertainment to any meal.
2. For washing your dishes—and those of 14 other relatives.
And the number 1 reason to be thankful on Thanksgiving …
1. That God loves us so much, he gave us a family to love, a turkey to eat, and a Son to save our souls.
I am thankful …
15. That someone else kills the turkey and removes those nasty gizzard things from their bodies.
14. That peanut butter-and-jelly sandwiches are always a safe stand-by when Uncle Dave's trying to cook the turkey in the microwave.
13. For conversation about a bunch of distant relatives you don't know, but you don't care 'cuz the food's so good.
12. For a family that loves you, even if Aunt Dorothy can't stop pinching your cheeks and exclaiming, "My how you've grown!"
11. That Thanksgiving is the one time you can eat for 8 hours straight, feel like ya gotta be rolled away from the table, but you keep right on eating.
10. For the crazy relatives who make you laugh right after you put mashed potatoes in your mouth just so they can watch you blow them out your nose.
9. For getting two days of school off—even though your teachers gave you so much homework, you'll never get it done by New Year's.
8. That this is the one time you don't have to sit next to your little brother who talks with his mouth full—he'll sit across from you instead.
7. For that one food dish you never quite know what it is.
6. For finally graduating from the "kids' table" to the "adults' table." (I graduated a few years ago.)
5. That there's always a football game to snooze through, despite the fact you're sharing a love seat with five of your relatives.
4. For hearing Grandpa pray.
3. That black olives, a.k.a. finger puppets, can add entertainment to any meal.
2. For washing your dishes—and those of 14 other relatives.
And the number 1 reason to be thankful on Thanksgiving …
1. That God loves us so much, he gave us a family to love, a turkey to eat, and a Son to save our souls.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Jokes given to me by Kaitlynn Bagwell
Mom:What did you do at school today?
Ethan: We did a guessing game.
Mom: I thought you were having a math exam?
Ethan: Thats right....
Prisilla: What sits at the bottom of the ocean and shakes?
Rufus: You've got me.
Prisilla: A nervous reck.
Prisilla: What do you get if you cross a cocker-spaniel, a poodle and a rooster?
Rufus: It's unknown to me.
Prisilla: A Cockapoodledoo
Teacher: I've had to punish you every day this week. What have you got to say?
Student: Boy, am I glad it's Friday.
Teacher: Why are you crawling into class?
Student: Because the class has already started and you said " Don't anyone dare walk into my class late."
Q. I have six eyes, two mouths, and three ears, what am I?
A. Ugly.
Jacob: Did you here about the man who got arressted for stealing a pig?
Lacey: How did they catch him?
Jacob: The pig squealed.
Codey: I'm aching from arthritis.
Kara: How do you do? I'm Kara from Hume, Lake California
Ethan: We did a guessing game.
Mom: I thought you were having a math exam?
Ethan: Thats right....
Prisilla: What sits at the bottom of the ocean and shakes?
Rufus: You've got me.
Prisilla: A nervous reck.
Prisilla: What do you get if you cross a cocker-spaniel, a poodle and a rooster?
Rufus: It's unknown to me.
Prisilla: A Cockapoodledoo
Teacher: I've had to punish you every day this week. What have you got to say?
Student: Boy, am I glad it's Friday.
Teacher: Why are you crawling into class?
Student: Because the class has already started and you said " Don't anyone dare walk into my class late."
Q. I have six eyes, two mouths, and three ears, what am I?
A. Ugly.
Jacob: Did you here about the man who got arressted for stealing a pig?
Lacey: How did they catch him?
Jacob: The pig squealed.
Codey: I'm aching from arthritis.
Kara: How do you do? I'm Kara from Hume, Lake California
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Always the Third Wheel
Q. I seem to frequently hang with people who are better friends with each other than with me—or they're dating. It makes me hesitant to do things with anyone unless it's just two of us. Should I let this bother me?
A. Being the third wheel can be tough. Because it bothers you, my advice is to intentionally avoid these kinds of situations as much as possible. It's going to happen now and then—and that's fine—but here's how you can keep them from happening too often: When invited to hang out with two others, ask if your friend would mind if you called another friend to join you. Also, make it a point to spend time with people one-on-one so you can bond with them and feel like you're focused on each other.
A high school girl once told me she was almost always home watching TV alone. I asked her how often she initiated times to hang out with people. She admitted she usually waited for others to call her. I think that was the problem.
I encouraged her to make a list of people she would like to hang out with, and take the initiative to call them. She did. Later, she told me she wasn't spending very much time at home alone when she wanted to be out with friends. She was now setting her social calendar. Maybe you could follow her example.
I have one other suggestion: Consider joining a small group. Most youth groups have them. Along with being a great way to grow in your faith, a small group gives you opportunities to develop some close friendships in a group bigger than three.
Jim is an author, longtime youth worker and founder of HomeWord, a group seeking to honor God through strong families.
A. Being the third wheel can be tough. Because it bothers you, my advice is to intentionally avoid these kinds of situations as much as possible. It's going to happen now and then—and that's fine—but here's how you can keep them from happening too often: When invited to hang out with two others, ask if your friend would mind if you called another friend to join you. Also, make it a point to spend time with people one-on-one so you can bond with them and feel like you're focused on each other.
A high school girl once told me she was almost always home watching TV alone. I asked her how often she initiated times to hang out with people. She admitted she usually waited for others to call her. I think that was the problem.
I encouraged her to make a list of people she would like to hang out with, and take the initiative to call them. She did. Later, she told me she wasn't spending very much time at home alone when she wanted to be out with friends. She was now setting her social calendar. Maybe you could follow her example.
I have one other suggestion: Consider joining a small group. Most youth groups have them. Along with being a great way to grow in your faith, a small group gives you opportunities to develop some close friendships in a group bigger than three.
Jim is an author, longtime youth worker and founder of HomeWord, a group seeking to honor God through strong families.
Monday, November 17, 2008
More Riddles from matthew Hemphill
What side of the mug should you put the handle on?
The outside
Why did the skelton cross the road?
To get to the body shop.
Why is it so hot in a stadium after a football game?
Because all the fans left.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off.
The outside
Why did the skelton cross the road?
To get to the body shop.
Why is it so hot in a stadium after a football game?
Because all the fans left.
Why did the elephant cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Jokes from Matthew Hemphill
What are two things you can never eat for breakfast?
Lunch and Dinner
What starts with a "T" is full of "T's" and ends with "T"?
A tea pot
What do you call cow with a twitch?
Beef Jerky
What is a parasite?
Something you see in Paris
Lunch and Dinner
What starts with a "T" is full of "T's" and ends with "T"?
A tea pot
What do you call cow with a twitch?
Beef Jerky
What is a parasite?
Something you see in Paris
Thursday, November 6, 2008
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